On a bright and sunny morning, I encountered an old neighbour – drooping shoulders and distant looks and it inspired me to try a small poem.
"Sparkling eyes! Sprightly Walk! Lively chatter! Happy Tunes!
Fast Forward a Decade
Blank looks! Dragging Feet! Slow conversations! No Music!
What could have happened to you?"
Got a lot of comments from friends and family alike and the simple response to it was – “ Life Happened”
There is a certain intensity with which I used to lead my life when I was younger – Be it watching 5 movies back to back or running 20 kilometers at a stretch or pulling of multiple all nighters at a stretch for no apparent reason. ______ I leave the space blank for you to introspect and fill up whatever may have been the quirky/ crazy thing that you did to make you, you.
Cut to present- there is routine, there are responsibilities – a job, a family and a child. The future only holds added responsibilities – of looking after ageing parents – in all probabilities two sets of them. The weight of these things literally pulls my shoulders down to droop.
Sometimes, you look to your friends for comfort, not because their words of encouragement can help but because you look at them and you see a certain similar kind of despair and in a very sadistic way it helps you because you know you are not alone. As a community of friends you happily and sometimes not so happily go down the downward spiral of “life”.
When you are younger, there are standard measures of success (read as exams, marks). As life happens to you, there are no standard measures, you don’t know what race you are in to know that you have reached the finish line. In fact, there is probably no race at all. Parenting especially is one such thing in life!
I grew up in a simple family in small town India, my parents way of encouraging me to do better was by telling me that I haven’t achieved anything and I m more capable than the biggest of my achievements. After my baby, I decided to quit my full time corporate job partly to spend more time with my baby and partly to realize my dream of having my own venture. But these are things that don’t really have finish lines or any standard measures of success. Coming from a background where achievement was highly prized, the current situation ironically adds further despair.
Writing, is a new hobby, I do it sporadically. But on the days I do it, the flow of words gives me a comfort that I have not known in my younger days. I write about business, I write about life, I write about parenting, I write about things that are close to my heart. It helps me open up and show my vulnerabilities, somehow by writing about my vulnerabilities, I feel strong enough to embrace them as a part of who I am. It is my way of looking at life and saying, “ Look you happened to me, but I happened right back to you”.
I know that I have reclaimed the intensity that I had when I was younger. I probably cannot pull off 5 movies back to back, but I now live today & look at tomorrow with hope and that means that I have the intensity to take me forward.
Everyone has lows and “ Life happens to you” but finding something new to do or re discovering an old hobby can catapult us to a new orbit and from this new orbit instead of life happening to you, you can make Life Happening!
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